"I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should you go. I will counsel you and watch over you." Psalm 32:8
I am holding God to this promise.
This is the verse I poured over, prayed over, contemplated and meditated on when I first began to think about seminary. And this is the verse I have gone to over and over again in the past 10 days.
There is a message that God has kept putting in front of me for several weeks now. I think maybe I am starting to get it. It started in Haiti in the sermon Pastor Pudence gave Sunday morning he said, in essence, it doesn't matter what YOUR plan for your life is. It doesn't really matter what you WANT to do, you will never find true contentment, fulfillment, and joy unless you do what GOD wants you to do. HIS plan in your life is primary and NOTHING can change the plans he has for you.
Last night as I was preparing for my Thursday morning bible study (which I wouldn't miss for the world). This same message came up again. God made you to be just who he wants you to be, no one else can be the you God wants YOU to be. And you can't fill someone else's role. It doesn't do any good looking to someone else to figure out who you want to be.
God will tell you who he wants you to be. He will instruct you and teach you in the way he wants you to go. This doesn't mean it will be the way YOU want to go, or that it will be easy. Sometime he has hard roads planned for us, seasons that challenge us beyond what we think we can handle. But he will counsel you and watch over you. And those things that he has given you that you honestly can't handle on your own? Well, beautiful one, you were never meant to. That's what he is for.
Seminary is hard, harder than I thought it would be. And even though I'm loving it, I feel myself start to panic when I think that this is what my life will be for the next 6-7 years. But I trust God, I trust in this promise.
He instructed me to go and I have to trust that he will counsel me and watch over me through this whole process. And he will do the same for you.